I don't know about you

but going back to my own little world every night, every day, is worth it.
so what if going back to reality hurts a bit(or a lot), it's all worth it.
because in my own world, what i want really happens.
i can write as much, or as little as i want. i listen to what music i want.
i paint what i want, i ruin what i want.
it's my world... and i can do what i want.

from here on out, i'm taking control of the world around me.
i'm not going to sit around being sad, because, frankly, being sad sucks.
but, wait. what am i doing right now?
sitting around, being sad.
i contradict myself easily.

i wish i hadn't said some things in public so easily.
we don't even talk anymore.
we used to be friends, but now you look my way, and we say nothing.
just like we were never friends.
but, it may be for the best.
because...i have people who are right for me.
i don't know what needs to be done.

i was drinking coffee i got last night.
i probably shouldn't though, the milk probably went bad.
but, i needed coffee. i think i'm addicted. oh well.
coffee makes me happy.
it's sad, but it's true.

coffee, friends, painting, photography, Canon, cats, tea, music, flute, piccolo, computer.
those are a few of the things that make me happy.

i want to be me.
i want to able to step out of my comfort zone, and create another somewhere else.
i want to be able to snap out of whatever funk i got myself into.
i just want to be happy.
and right now, i'll do crazy things to achieve the happiness i want.